What Not To Rent: List #3 11/08/2009

October rentals turned out to be decent, although I know this list is coming to you a little off schedule.  I apologize for that.  On with the list.

1. Land of the Lost – This is possibly one of the worst movies ever, and it ranks in the same horrible category as Cabin Boy. Don’t let Will Ferrell persuade you to rent this even though you know he is mad funny.  I’m telling you, this was horrible!  The opening fight scene with Matt Lauer was hilarious and it made me say, “Hmm, this movie doesn’t seem so bad.”  Wrong!  From there, it goes downhill until it grows into a giant hairy ball of drain clog.  The movie also has one of the most annoying characters, a monkey man named Chaka, who is thrown in for comic relief but he’s as bothersome as Jar Jar Binks.  Stay very far away from this movie.  I feel sorry for those who went to see this at the theaters.  Have you recovered yet?  I hope you walked out and got your money back. On another note, I’ve never seen Gigli yet.
2. Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen – If you read a previous post of mine entitled, “My Top 3 Most Lousy Directors”, then you’ll know that I think Michael Bay is the corniest, cheesiest, lamest movie director ever.  I hated the first Transformers as much as I hate this one.  Why, oh why, did the producers choose Michael Bay to direct these movies – Steven Spielberg, too!  I’d expect Spielberg as executive producer to make better decisions because he’s one of the best directors ever, along with my other favorite, John Ford.   But back to the movie.  They turned one of my favorite cartoons as a kid into a show of silly characters.  But if you’re a 13-year-old boy or a hardcore Megan Fox fan, then you’ll love this movie.  Please don’t let Micheal Bay anywhere near a Robotech movie!  He will ruin it!  I heard that Tobey Maguire has something to do with the upcoming movie.  Thank goodness!
3. G.I. Joe: The Rise of Cobra – Yet another 80’s cartoon that’s been turned into a movie.  After the first five minutes of nanomites – microscopic robots used as weapons – and Marlon Wayans, I already knew it was going to be bad.  Wayans is funny if he’s doing a movie like White Chicks, but as a soldier, he just doesn’t cut it.  The way the hero was saved near the end was very predictable.  There were some cool moments of action but it didn’t make up for the lack of luster and substance. Oh, but you already know there’ll be a sequel someday.  Sigh.  Now when are they going to do a Thundercats movie?  Ho!
4. In the Name of the King – Starring Jason Statham, Ray Liotta, Burt Reynolds and Leelee Sobieski.  This is a Medieval fantasy that totally fails.  Ray Liotta is such a good actor but why did he seem so low rate in this?   Stick with Lord of the Rings.  Or better yet, read the book because you non-readers haven’t heard about the scouring of the Shire at the end when the Hobbits returned home, or Tom Bombadil and other elements.  Movies are shortened versions of books!  But here I am again off on a tangent.

SO-SO’s OF THE MONTH

• Chaos - Starring Jason Statham and Wesley Snipes.  It first looked like it was going to be a bank-robbers-carry-out-a-heist-and-how-are-they-going-to-save-the-hostages movie, but it turned out to be more than that.   Pay attention at the explosion scene.  I knew something was fishy.
• The Proposal – Starring Sandra Bullock, Ryan Reynolds and Betty White.  If you hate romantic comedies or Sandra Bullock, then you don’t need to see this.  Ryan Reynolds was actually pretty good in this role, though.
• Imagine That – Starring Eddie Murphy, Thomas Haden Church and Nicole Ari Parker.  Eddie Murphy tries to deal with his daughter’s imaginary friends while becoming a better dad. It was cute and had the usual Eddie Murphy comedy.  The little girl who plays his daughter is very cute.
• The Statement – Starring Michael Caine and Tilda Swinton.  Michael Caine’s character has been on the run and in hiding for many years as a war criminal.  Will they get him?  It’s supposedly based on true events.
• Grey Gardens – Starring Drew Barrymore and Jessica Lange.  This is about the Edie Beales, the cousin and aunt of Jackie Kennedy.  Both actresses were outstanding in their roles.

SURPRISE OF THE MONTH

• Drag Me to Hell – Starring Alison Loman and Justin Long.  This Sam Raimi (Spiderman) directed movie is not your typical slasher horror flick with scantily clad girls running away from getting bloody.  Don’t let the title fool you into thinking it is.  It’s not scary so it’s okay if you watch it at night (I, myself was afraid of that).  It’s has some gross moments but they make you laugh and you’ll love the fight scene in the car – very Raimi-esque.  Guys may walk away loving the movie but hating Justin Long’s character because he was the perfect boyfriend!  This will be a Halloween classic filled with fun.

RECO OF THE MONTH

• The Taking of Pelham 123 – Starring Denzel Washington, John Travolta, John Turturro, James Gandolfini and Luis Guzman.  I was skeptical in the beginning because of the choppy editing that was trying to be too artsy, but it turned out to be a solid dialogue movie.  And it stars Denzel and John Travolta so you know it’s going to be enjoyable.  Will Denzel bring home that gallon of milk?  Find out for yourself and rent it.

 

 

Unpleasant Reads 10/30/2009

The following books were some miserable reads for me.   We all have different preferences, though, and some of these are classics.   But there is no way I could ever recommend any book on this list.

• THE BROTHERS KARAMAZOV by Fyordor Dostoevsky:  I read this for pleasure after reading Crime and Punishment because I highly enjoyed the psychological thrills and drama.  Oh, that rascal Raskolnikov.  So I thought I’d delve into more Russian literature by this author, but that was a big mistake.  The book was probably the number one most tortuous book I’ve ever tried to get through, but I can proudly say that I did, in fact, finish it.  It’s filled with too much philosophical ramblings, so be warned.  And did I mention it’s about a thousand pages long?
• FOUCAULT’S PENDULUM by Umberto Eco:  Want to be confused?  Read this.  It sounds like a book for a Da Vinci Code fan but this is very different from a Dan Brown book.  I always knew I should have read The Name of the Rose instead, but after finally getting to the end of this terror, I’ve been wary to pick up another Eco book.
• THE TIME TRAVELER’S WIFE by Audrey Niffenegger:   I read this about five years ago and I just could not stand it!  I know, I know – some people love this novel so much and put it on their favorites list.  But I cannot stand it!
• THE HOUSE OF MIRTH by Edith Wharton:  This definitely did not live up to its name.  It was more like the house of depression.
• THE MOONSTONE by Wilke Collins: I was watching Jeopardy one day and this book happened to be the answer, er I mean, the question to the answer.  Alex Trebek proclaimed that he loved to read this at night with his flashlight when he was younger.  I should have known better because I think Alek Trebek has some very dry humor and I would never want to hang out with him.  The book was a bore and the mystery wasn’t intriguing.
• STRANGE FITS OF PASSION by Anita Shreve:  This was my first Anita Shreve book and I never picked up another.
• THE WOLF’S HOUR by Robert R. McCammon:  This author wrote one of my top five books, Boy’s Life, and I was so excited to start reading this.  Huge disappointment.   If you haven’t heard of this author and you’re a fan of Stephen King, you must check him out because they are comparable to each other – they can both write horror and thrills but amaze you even more when they write non-horror stories.
• THE STRANGER by Albert Camus:  A classic that was a requirement for a class I took, so I was forced to read it.  Good thing that it’s short!
• WINESBURG, OHIO by Sherwood Anderson:  A pick by the lousiest English teacher I’ve ever had in my life.   Have you ever wondered why some teachers ever became teachers or professors in the first place when they don’t give a darn about their students and their teaching methods are horrendous?  Just imagine this guy talking to a roomful of college students like kindergartners.   But getting back to the book, it was as lousy as my English teacher.

 

 

The Wedding: Why I Love The Office 10/10/2009

You’ve probably seen that wedding video on YouTube that came out this summer when the wedding party danced down the aisle to Chris Brown’s Forever (he’s still on my sh*tlist for being a punk).  If you haven’t, view it below.

And if you didn’t see the recent episode of The Office, they parodied this video during Jim and Pam’s wedding.  Hilarious!  (See The Office video here.)  Not only was it funny, but I wanted to laugh and cry at the same time.  I laughed at the first bars of Forever because I knew what was coming.  Then I laughed out loud at Andy happily struggling down the aisle on his walker with an ecstatic expression on his face, Oscar vouging, Kevin crashing into the candelabra and floral arrangement, Dwight kicking his one-night-stand in the face, and the look on Michael’s face while leading the Soul Train line in rainbow arms (and Andy still happily struggled).   But Jim and Pam already knew that their office friends would ruin their wedding in some way, so during the dance, they smiled at each other because they held a secret – they already got married a few minutes earlier on a boat with the beautiful Niagara Falls behind them.  How romantic!  I didn’t even know people could get married on a boat (Maid of the Mist) at Niagara Falls.   Their flashback of their intimate and dreamy wedding vows during the hilarious dancing made me smile and want to cry for them.  I know, mushy-mushy, huh?

If that YouTube video didn’t come out when it did, then Jim and Pam’s wedding would have played out differently.  I wonder what the writers would have come up with instead.  So, Season 6 was the perfect time for their wedding.

I love The Office!  Steve Carrell and The Office get robbed every year whenever Alec Baldwin and 30 Rock win Emmy’s.

What Not To Rent: List #2 10/04/2009

In my last WNTR list, I said that I would only include new DVD releases specific to that particular month.   But, I’ve changed my mind and decided to include whatever movies or TV shows I’ve Netflixed for that month.  Here’s the September list:

1. Alias: Season 1: Disc 1 – This was a very popular TV show that I never watched, plus I’m not all into Jennifer Garner, but I decided to give it a try since I’m such a Lost (J. J. Abrams) fan.  Big mistake!  Sydney Bristow did not convince me that she was some hot shot spy.  She looked somewhat unsure of herself at times and the fighting is slow and choreographed-looking.  It was like I was watching a girl fantasizing about being a cool spy.
2. 28 Weeks Later – Starring Rose Byrne and Robert Carlyle.  After being pleasantly surprised with 28 Days Later, I’ve been wanting to see this flick for the longest time.  I should have known that it was one of those bad sequels and not the good kind, not to mention predictable.
3. Angela’s Ashes – Starring Emily Watson and Robert Carlyle.  The most depressing movie ever.  If you want to be put into a bad mood or put others into one, then rent this.
4. The Sopranos: Season 1: Disc 1 – I don’t get it.  I was majorly bored.

SO-SOs OF THE MONTH

• True Romance – Starring Christian Slater, Patricia Arquette, Christopher Walken, Dennis Hopper and Brad Pitt.  I love Patricia Arquette for her fight scene.  Brad Pitt was a stoner in this movie.
• X-Men Origins: Wolverine – Starring Hugh Jackman and Liev Shcreiber.  X-Men fans finally get to see Gambit in a movie.  It’s one of those movies where the introduction of a character has to be explained, so hopefully X-Men Origins: Wolverine 2 will move along quicker and be better.
• Bangkok Dangerous – Starring Nick Cage.  You know, it wasn’t as bad as I thought it would be.   But there was definitely some corniness in there, like when Nick Cage’s character fell in love with a deaf girl and really had no way to communicate with her except through some body gestures.  Then there was that fight scene in the kitchen with his future apprentice.  I preferred the alternative ending in the special features.

SURPRISE OF THE MONTH

• The Wiz – Starring Diana Ross, Richard Pryor and Michael Jackson.  I don’t know why this movie got bad reviews.  It was a reimagining of The Wizard of Oz with a Motown sound.  Michael Jackson was actually a really good actor in this movie, as well as the guy who played the Tin Man.   Ease on down the road with this one, however, it was a little too long.  I also kept wondering where Toto was throughout the movie because he had little screen time.  Maybe they had trouble training the dog or something.

HO-HUM OF THE MONTH

• Monsters vs Aliens – Voiced by Reese Witherspoon, Hugh Laurie, Keifer Sutherland, Paul Rudd and Seth Rogan.  This was definitely NOT a Pixar movie, which always has a great, smart story with wonderful characters, and at least one teary-eyed moment.   With this movie, I didn’t even care one bit about the characters, nor was the story touching.  The whole premise seemed exciting but most of all the funny moments were already in the trailer.  I loved the Axel Foley scene, though.

RECOs OF THE MONTH

• On Golden Pond – This movie earned 10 Academy Awards in 1982 and starred the iconic Katherine Hepburn and Henry Fonda as a grumpy old man in the early stages of Alzheimer’s.  Take note of the cinematography.  Jane Fonda also stars.
• Life on Mars- Starring Jason O’Mara, Harvey Keitel, Gretchen Mol and Michael Imperioli.  The best cancelled TV show is out on DVD.  Make sure you check it out!

******************************

There were hardly any exciting new releases this month.  Hopefully, October will be better.

Fall TV: Pilots & Premieres 09/29/2009

I’m a little late doing this post but here we go…

*THE USUAL GREATS*

1.  CSI: CRIME SCENE INVESTIGATION – The best premiere of the season with its Matrix-inspired opening shootout scene that left you wondering what the heck happened at their headquarters.  Sara Sidle (Jorja Fox) makes a guest appearance, also.  I gotta give ya a link: see the episode, “Family Affair”, here.

2. GREY’S ANATOMY – So George is dead.  I thought they fooled us all this summer when T. R. Knight was definitely not returning to the show.  But, he really is gone.  Why couldn’t it be Izzy instead?  The first hour was better than the second, though, and I don’t even know why they had to make it two hours.

3. MEDIUM - Why did NBC even drop that show?  I admit, I’m not a loyal follower, only because I used to always get scared at night of the opening credits, which are the creepiest out there, but I always liked the writing and the characters.  It’s like a drama and a mystery, then all of the sudden, there are scary and eerie moments that startle you.  I’m glad CBS picked it up.

4. THE OFFICE – OMG, the opening parkour scene was so freaking hilarious!  It died down a bit throughout the rest of the show but it was still funny.

5. DANCING WITH THE STARS – Alec Mazo is back and I hope he lasts longer than in previous seasons.  Michael Irving is a disappointment though, especially after trying to best Jerry Rice.  I’m surprised he didn’t mention Emmitt Smith. Go Maya and Mark!

*THE MAYBES*

1. THE FORGOTTEN – Christian Slater and his citizen volunteers get together to help identify John and Jane Doe’s.  So far, it’s keeping me interested and it looks promising.  I’ll keep my fingers crossed.  UPDATE: I officially love the show.

2.  NCIS: LOS ANGELES – I could never get into the original series but LL Cool J and the setting attracted me to this show.  The pilot had cool people, a cool mission office and LL’s cool looking Dodge Charger.  Oh, wait, that’s a Challenger that looks like a modern old school Charger.  (I want that car!)  But the fight scene was corny and so choreographed, and the way G (Chris O’Donnell) got out of his sticky situation was also lame.  Hetty, the gadget gal, is a fun character and you’ll automatically think of The Incredibles when you see her.

I’m watching the second episode right now and I’m not really impressed anymore.  Hmm…

3.  FLASH FORWARD – I wasn’t really going to watch this but had to check it out because of Joseph Fiennes.  John Cho from the horrible Harold & Kumar movies can actually be taken seriously in this show.  But after the first half hour, I wasn’t buying it anymore and the whole premise seemed silly.  Was this really supposed to appeal to Lost fans?  If I’m not intrigued by the second episode, I’m dropping this show.  UPDATE:  I’m dropping this show off my TV schedule.

*THE REJECTS*

1.  EASTWICK - I always loved the movie but after the first ten minutes, it was too much of a chick’s show – and I am a chick.

2.  MODERN FAMILY – It’s shot documentary style like The Office and has the same exact feel as The Office, except that it’s not funny.

*THE I-HAVE-NO-INTEREST-IN-WATCHING-THIS SHOWS*

1. THE GOOD WIFE – I can’t believe they made a TV show out of dirty politician’s antics.  And I literally mean, dirty.

2.  THE BEAUTIFUL LIFE – I love you Ashton but I’d expect you to pick a better subject than models living in New York.  And guess what?  It’s already been canceled.

3.  TRAUMA - Looks like a dorky Grey’s Anatomy.

4.  THREE RIVERS – Looks like a dorky Grey’s Anatomy.

5.  CASTLE – Last season, I highly looked forward to this show and was bored with it in the first 20 minutes.  I never watched it again.

6. THE VAMPIRE DIARIES – I’m sick of vampires, already.

7. COUGAR TOWN – I think this is marketed toward certain ladies – and I’m not one of them.

8. THE JAY LENO SHOW – He was never funny and still isn’t.  Go Letterman!

*THE GOTTA-SEE-BUT-THERE’S-NO-VIDEO-AVAILABLE SHOWS*

1.  THE MENTALIST – Come on, CBS!

2. CRIMINAL MINDS - What’s up, CBS?

3. THE BIG BANG THEORY – Where’s the video, CBS?

4.  SOUTHLAND - Cops shot documentary style with bleeped-out curse words.

*THE I-NEED-TO-CHECK-OUT SHOWS*

1. FRINGE

2. PARKS AND RECREATION

3. GLEE

****************************

Then there are all those cable shows, too.  Ah, too much TV to watch!

Today’s Hodgepodge 09/14/2009

*THE 2009 VMAS*

• Kanye West has always been an attention-getter to make up for his lack in stature, muscles and probably something else.  Ahem.  He always speaks before he thinks, and I remember a time when Justin Timberlake had won an award (a Grammy, or something) and he boasted how he should have won instead because his song was better and blasé, blasé – it’s all about me, me, me, me, me.  Then yesterday, not only did he diss Taylor Swift but he embarrassed Beyoncé as well by dragging her into his mud, and ultimately stole both their winning moments.   But, Beyoncé’s classy and gracious invitation to Taylor during her own acceptance speech was so heartwarming.  Way to go, ladies!  Now everyone hates Kanye, including his colleagues.  (UPDATE: Even Obama has been quoted to say, “What a jackass.”)  Ya got what was comin’ to ya and you should learn about Karma.   He just doesn’t need to be invited to award shows anymore.   (And because of this controversy, Jay Leno might get a major boost in his ratings tonight for his new show, which might also boost his ego.  Letterman is the man!)
• The Michael Jackson Tribute was awesome and seeing Janet dancing next to her brother got me all choked up.
• Lady GaGa is too much of a character, right down to her outrageous outfits, her stage name and her over-the-top “I’m-bleeding-because-of-the-paparazzi-chasing-me-and-I’m-going-to-die-hanging-here” performance.  I started laughing like hell when she started playing the piano with one leg up on the piano keys – open wide.  But she sells a bunch of records and I don’t think she’ll go away soon.
• I don’t really care about the New Moon trailer, just like how I didn’t really care about the mediocre, overrated books either.  I only liked the Italy sequence in the New Moon book, but I thought that when they try to adapt it to the screen, it would come off really corny. Bella went all suicidal in the book and she would see flashbacks of Edward and hear his voice in her head.  This would be hard to translate on to the screen without looking pathetic.  And yup, the trailer exudes corniness.  Edward’s not looking so hot anymore, either.

*SERENA WILLIAMS*

• After her ugly tirade, she finally made a public apology during her press conference before her Doubles match.  Although it was through a smiling face, I doubt how sincere it was.  I bet she’s damn happy that Kanye’s outburst is taking the attention off of her today.

*ROGER FEDERER VS. JUAN MARTIN DEL POTRO*

• *Sniffle*  Roger Federer didn’t win his 6th straight US Open title, but that’s okay because he already has 15 Grand Slam wins.  A determined Del Potro outplayed a flustered Federer today, who made a lot of errors and double faults.  I don’t know what was pressuring Federer; maybe he wanted to win a title for his newborn twins.  He was out of touch today and the better player won.  If he can beat Nadal and Federer, then Del Potro deserves to be the new champion.  A pat on the back for him and Argentinian fans.

*THIS IS IT*

• The trailer for Michael Jackson’s This Is It movie looks amazing and it got me all choked up again.  It looks like it would have been one of his best concerts ever, if not, the best.  RIP.  See the trailer here if the video below is no longer available.

*PATRICK SWAYZE PASSED AWAY*

• “Nobody puts Baby in the corner.” Who’s ever going to forget that line by Johnny Castle in the cult classic Dirty Dancing?  Patrick Swayze’s other most memorable role was Sam Wheat in Ghost, which featured the iconic romantic scene of wet clay and sex to the song Unchained Melody.  Rest easy, Patrick. I’d like to mention a few of his other roles that people may have forgotten about.
• Darrel “Darry” Curtis, Ponyboy’s brother, in The Outsiders
• Bouncer Dalton in Roadhouse
• Surfer dude bank-robbing Bodhi in Point Break
• Sweet and sensible transvestite Vida in To Wong Foo Thanks For Everything, Julie Newmar (I forgot about that movie!)
• He was also good in City of Joy.  His character’s name was Max Lowe

Champions Have Class, and Serena Lost Because of Her Threats, Not the Foot Fault 09/13/2009

Winners have the will to keep cool and refocus their minds in bad situations in order to come back and improve their game with their unquestionable talents.  Champions have class, and especially if you are a woman, you would want to act ladylike and not let the anger monster in you get too wild, especially when millions of people are watching.

Because Serena Williams acted a fool yesterday, she lost a point for making threats to a linesperson and lost the match.  It’s okay to get mad but you can’t threaten people!  She already showed her frustrations after the first set when she broke her racquet, and was near to losing the match in the second set – Clijsters just outplayed her.  Serena brought it on to herself and got what was coming to her so there’s no one to blame but herself.  Not only did she embarrass herself, but her family, also, who sure as hell didn’t teach her to act that way, especially when she’s been so successful at her game.  And don’t try to make it into a racial thing, like some people are, because that has nothing to do with it.

Then some people want to blame the linesperson for the controversial call, but because there is no video footage of the side angle, we don’t really know if it was accurate or not.  Despite that, rules are rules, and in tennis – as well as baseball – you can’t challenge certain calls.  You may be able to mouth off a few harsh words (a la John McEnroe, who has lost a game for an outburst, as well), but when you start making threats, you are penalized or ejected from that game, like in many other sports.  Michelle Wie once lost a golf game because she forgot to sign her card at the end of the game.  Rules are rules, people, and why should there be any exceptions?  Another thing about the linesperson, she wasn’t a tattle-tale; she was summoned by the chair umpire to report what was said to her – that’s part of her job.

Maybe I should explain what happened now if you missed yesterday’s fiasco.  Serena Williams was already frustrated with herself after losing the first set to Kim Clijsters, who was calm, cool and happened to be playing better than Serena that day.   So Serena bounced her racquet on the ground then slammed it into the pavement and “broke” it – actually it was severely dented.  That’s a code violation and many others have been cited for that.  Then in the second set when a potential win for Clijsters was apparent, a serving Serena was trailing at 15-30 and a foot fault was called, resulting in 15-40, and match point for Clijsters.  Serena started to walk toward the linesperson with an accusing finger and a ball in her hand and said, “I swear to God, I would take this f*ucking ball and shove it down your f*cking throat.” She has also been quoted to say, “You better be f*ucking right.  You don’t f*ucking know me.”  Dang, was she implying that the linesperson would be jumped or something?  Okay, she had her words and it was time to just collect herself, drop the attitude, get back into the game, and ace a point.  She went to the base line and started bouncing the ball to ready herself for the serve.  Then Serena turned back to the linesperson a second time, pointed her racket at her and mouthed off more words. The tournament referees were already on their way onto the court, and took into consideration the previous code violation with this new violation for her threats, and Clijsters was given match point.  Game over.  If she said less harsh words like, “Are you f*cking serious?  Are you blind or something?” instead of making threats, then maybe they would have kept on playing.

Serena didn’t lose because of the foot fault because it was still 15-40 after that call.  All she had to do was keep aceing her serves to save her game.  But because she lost her cool, showed no class, got all ghetto and made threats to the linesperson instead of concentrating on much needed points, she got another code violation – her second one of the match – and Clijster was awarded match point in a game that she was already winning. Serena has no one to blame but herself.  What a poor sport.   Then at the press conference, she tried to play it off and act like she couldn’t remember what she said to the linesperson.  Yeah, right!  It was obvious she was caught on video and a bunch of witnesses were within earshot.  If she doesn’t offer an apology to the linesperson, to the game, to her fans, or to the little girls who look up to her, then I can’t see how a champion can act this way.

Mary Carillo, an well-known tennis commentator, said that Serena deserved an Oscar for her press conference.

UPDATE:  I just heard during the Federer v. Djokovic game (woo hoo Federer!) that Serena will be fined $10,000 for her threats and an extra $500 for the broken racquet.  That’s small potatoes for her.  She should have dinner with John McEnroe because he’s so nice now.

Pittsburgh Steelers Put a Win on the Board 09/11/2009

Woo Hoo!  Football season is back and my beloved Pittsburgh Steelers are now 1-0, but it was a little frustrating last night.  I’m the type that yells at the TV whenever I watch football and it was pretty noisy yesterday.

I am so freaking bummed that my favorite athlete, Troy Polamalu, got injured in the very first game of the season and had to leave just before halftime.  Boo hoo.  It turns out he sprained his left knee – well, that dude landed on it – and Coach Tomlin said it could be three to six weeks before he returns.  Nooooo!  Their defense isn’t so exciting without him, even though they still can stop people.  But what was up with that face mask penalty, Troy?  You know you don’t play dirty.  That pass interference call was total BS, too.

Now, I love Troy Polamalu because he is fierce on the field and plays with all his heart.  He’s not cocky or showy (that’s why Roger Federer is my #2 favorite athlete),  he doesn’t do little dances nor will he ever legally change his last name to Cuatrotres (a la Chad Johnson).  He’s humble but he can take you down in a heartbeat!  His five Pro Bowl games and two Super Bowl rings back up his talent and his trademark is his poofy, long, curly hair streaking the field.  If you see it, watch out.   But he isn’t as scary as he looks and some of his teammates has said he’s the sweetest guy off the field.  Number 43, please get well and come back soon!

When Hines Ward was about to seal the win for the team during the last several seconds, I admit, I was yelling, “Go, go, go” and wanted him to go for the touchdown because I was in the heat of the moment, just like Hines – he hardly fumbles, either.  Then crap, the ball got stripped and that’s when we all knew he should have done the textbook thing and take a knee or slide down, so that they could run the clock down to 4 or 5 seconds, and kick an easy field goal for the win.  But no; that’s when my yelling got louder.  Hines knew he made a mistake, and really started to beat himself up  because he’s usually smarter than that.  But I was like, “It’s ok, game ain’t over yet and you’re the Pittsburgh Steelers.  Ben is going to get it down the field for you and you’ll end up winning anyway.”  And what happened?  Exactly that.  Gosh, it’s so nerve-racking when I watch football.

Keep racking up the wins, boys, and you’ll be in the Super Bowl again.

The last thing I want to discuss is the issue with Ben Roethlisberger, which I think is a fake accusation just so that girl can get attention.  Rape is not a joke; it’s a serious offense but knowing Ben as an athlete, I do not believe these allegations and that biatch is a liar!  It’s a shame that she has to smear his name, especially to those who don’t really know who Ben is.   Hopefully, the truth and justice will prevail.

Oprah Got Flash Mobbed 09/11/2009

Yesterday during Oprah’s Kickoff Party for her 24th season, the Black Eyed Peas performed a different version of I Gotta Feeling (they changed the lyric night into day) to a huge crowd on Chicago’s Miracle Mile.  After 30 seconds into the song, I thought it was the deadest crowd I’d ever seen because nary a soul was moving or dancing, except for one girl in blue in the front row – bless her little heart.  I was like, “Man, this crowd is embarrassing Oprah and the Peas.”  Then when a small group in the front started to dance in synchronicity with the girl in blue, I knew it was one of those mass dance routine thingies, which is called a flash mob.   They tricked us!  Check out the video because it’s pretty cool.

Image Credit: Kiichiri Sato/ AP Photo

American Idol: Ellen is the People’s Judge 09/11/2009

I was completely shocked when Ellen announced that she would be the new judge on American Idol.  But, I immediately smiled and cheered because I love her!  She seems like an unlikely choice for the show since they usually invite guest judges that are a part of the music industry (except for that one ridiculous time when Quentin Tarantino was invited for Movie Week).

I believe she’s a great choice because she’s a fan of the show who’s been watching since the very first season, and she always critiques it on her own show.  She can dance, she listens to a lot of R&B, Rap and Hip-Hop music, and she definitely knows what she likes and doesn’t like when she hears a song, just like us – the viewers at home. Ellen represents us, and will be the people’s, or consumer’s, judge who will offer her opinion among the panel of “elites” – Simon, Randy and Kara.

“But wait”, you say, “she can’t sing!”  Can Simon sing?  No!  But Simon has an ear for music and an eye for talent, just like we, the viewer.   He always offers his honest opinions – which is why I appreciate his criticisms – and I feel Ellen will offer honesty but in a non-condescending way.  Then there’s – I mean, was - Paula Abdul, whom I also love  and I remember the days when I’d sing along to Forever Your Girl, but is Paula a great singer like Whitney Houston?  No!  But no one complained about her being a judge for a singing show.  Then there’s Randy, who played bass for Journey but whenever he tries to sing some notes, it doesn’t sound so great.  Instead, Randy uses his talents for the behind-the-scenes aspect of music, just like Kara Dioguardi, who has an extra talent for writing songs.

So I don’t see why some people are talking smack about Ellen.  She offers something different and AI needs something new and fresh to boost their ratings.  I can’t even remember the name of the guy who won last season.  I remember Adam, but not the “winner.”  Anyway, Ellen will be working on her talk show on days, and on AI at nights, and if someone has that kind of commitment and work ethic, then how can you slam her?  Give her a chance Ellen-haters.  She will actually boost ratings and I’m looking forward to watching a new season of AI more than ever before.

So just because you’re not a musician or part of the music industry doesn’t mean you don’t know anything about music.  And thank God the new permanent judge isn’t Posh Spice!  If Paula wasn’t such a great singer, Victoria Beckham sure ain’t, and I wouldn’t have wanted another British judge on American Idol, nor someone with a “plastic” image who has said that she’d never wear flat shoes.  What?!

Way to go for choosing Ellen Degeneres as the new judge for American Idol.  Get ready for more laughs!

EXTRA:  There’s one thing I’d like to see change on the show.  I wish they’d have one season where only the four judges get to decide who gets voted off each week instead of “America’s” votes, and ultimately pick the winner.  Sometimes, the show turns into a popularity contest and tweens just call in for the cutest guy.  Chris Daughtry, Melinda Doolitle, Jennifer Hudson and Michael Johns all got robbed in some way, but both Chris and Jennifer have found better fame.  I’m still looking out for Melinda and Michael, though.

9/11 09/11/2009

It’s September 11, 2009 – the eighth anniversary of that tragic day.  I just wanted to post a quick tribute for the family and friends of the victims in New York, the Pentagon, and the field near Shanksville, Pennsylvania.  I also thank the awesome New York Fire Department for their courage and the many volunteers of the aftermath.

I’m ashamed to say that I almost forgot about the 9/11 anniversary until yesterday.  For the family members, everyday is 9/11 and I can’t imagine what they have to deal with.  I wish you the best.

Image Credit: Jeff Christensen/Reuters

America’s Next Top Model: Go Shortie! 09/09/2009

This season of America’s Next Top Model is the most distinct because all the “petite” girls out there that are under 5′ 7″ are being allowed to rock the runway.  The average height of women is actually 5′ 4″ and petites would be shorter than that, but in the modeling world, if you’re  5′ 7″ or under, then you’re considered short.  But don’t say that to Kate Moss or Josie Maran because they are both vertically-challenged models who are excepted in the industry.

Cycle 13 of ANTM features fourteen girls and the show is back in L.A., baby.   Their house is decorated like a candied doll house complete with a swimming pool and V-shaped runway.

A new judge has arrived to take the place of Paulina Porizkova, who I never cared for anyway because of her slight meanness and unconstructive criticism.  Chanel Iman seems to be more like the Paula Abdul of ANTM – nice and sweet…so far.

Because of their certain looks, my favorite three girls are Lisa, the wild card who took the place of the weirdo girl who dropped out for some unknown reason, Courtney the “crutched” Floridian who persevered despite her broken foot, and Sundai, the last one picked who cried for joy.   However, they didn’t do so hot in their photo shoots except for Courtney, who came out with a beautiful and artsy photo.  Lisa (pictured right) kind of looks like a cross between Michelle Rodriguez and Vanessa Hudgens. What do you think?

Courtney and Sundai

So who went home?  Lisa, the girl who got a second chance but didn’t take full advantage of that opportunity.  Courtney’s got confidence and Sundai needs a little more.  I’ll be rooting for them but someone else might shine in the next episode.  I haven’t gotten a feel about all their personalities yet, so we’ll just have to see.

Go shawty!  It’s your birthday!  Go shawty!  It’s your birthday!

Top 10 Favorite TV Shows 09/09/2009

1. 24:  Jack Bauer (Kiefer Sutherland) is a slight man, but he can scare any terrorist or miscreant and take them down in seconds.  He’s like Rambo, MacGuyver and Sam Fisher (Splinter Cell) wrapped up into one person.

This show depicts the events of one day, thus the name of twenty-four hours, and it’s usually fast-paced and highly exciting.  Not only is this show filled with thrills and suspense, but it also has a lot of drama, little comedic moments – usually from Jack’s right hand “man”, Chloe – romantic moments (please come back Audrey), and of course, action and adventure.  It’s one of those riveting shows where you can’t wait for the next episode.

If you’ve never seen 24, rent the best season, Season 5, and you’ll want to go back to Season One and watch the entire series.  I promise you!

Extra Tidbit:  Did you know Kiefer’s full name is Kiefer William Frederick Dempsey George Rufus Sutherland? …Dang.

*******************************

2. BATTLESTAR GALACTICA (2004):  BSG is NOT geeky like Star Trek. Not that Star Trek is a dorky show or anything because I have nothing against it, but it’s been dubbed as a geek’s show.  There’s a misconception that all sci-fi shows are like Star Trek.  Wrong!  Battlestar Galactica is mainly a DRAMA that is set in space and it is a character-driven show.  Like 24, there’s thrills, suspense, romance, funny moments, action and adventure, but BSG has more sex (non-HBO appropriate).  Guys out there will appreciate scantily clad Number Six while women have Lee Adama – aka Apollo – to swoon for.  Plus it has its own made up cuss word: frak.

In this reimagining of the old school show, Starbuck is a woman and there’s no fuzzy creatures in this one, also.  The Cylons are not aliens – as some of you non-watchers are thinking -  but machines created by humans which evolved into human-looking forms.  Finding out who are Cylons and who aren’t add to the suspense and anticipation of the show.  The writers , by the way, relied on a wing and a prayer to churn out the storyline but it all came together – genius!  They didn’t even know who the Cylons were going to be from the first episode and down to the Final Five.

It’s just a tight-knit drama that is one of the best shows ever.  I’m still sad it ended. =(  Colonel Tigh and Baltar are my favorite characters, and of course, Starbuck as well.  In fact, the entire ensemble deserves recognition, especially Edward James Olmos and Mary McDonnell.

I miss you BSG!  So say we all.

*******************************

3. CSI: CRIME SCENE INVESTIGATION:  Forget the over-the-top CSI: Miami and it’s neon-lighted look.  The original series set in Las Vegas is the best of the CSIs.  This is probably the best crime-solving show there is and includes another stellar cast.  However, Grissom (William Peterson) has left the show, as well as Sara Sidle (Jorja Fox) and Warrick Brown (Gary Dourdan – I never liked him anyway), so it’s not the same as it used to be but it’s still a solid crime show.  Laurence Fishburne has been added to the cast as Dr. Raymond Langston who’s learning the ropes of his new job and Catherine Willows (Marg Helgenberger) took the place of Grissom’s position.  Look out for the lab techies, David Hodges and Wendy Simms, for their comic relief, but that usually comes from all characters.  (Did you see the Star Trek episode?)

If you haven’t seen an episode of CSI, rent Season 7, which is the best because of its interesting miniature killer storyline.

********************

4.  GREY’S ANATOMY:   I’d probably would have never watched this show if I didn’t catch a recap episode during the middle of Season 1.  This is set at Seattle Grace Hospital (oh, the rainy days) and includes yet another outstanding cast, especially Bailey, who dubbed the word vajayjay.  The former interns are now attending physicians and have their own interns.  The show is about relationships but I wouldn’t call it a “chick’s show.”  The writing is witty and poignant, but if you’re easily sickened by the sight of blood and guts, you may get a little queasy.   It won a Golden Globe in 2007 for the best dramatic television series, though the recent seasons haven’t been as good as the earlier ones.

******************************

5. THE OFFICE:  Simply hilarious!  It’s shot documentary style without an audience and set in Scranton.  If you don’t find Dwight Schrute’s antics funny then you need to lighten up.  I seriously think Steve Carrell, who plays the very inappropriate but fun-loving Michael Scott, deserves an Emmy for this role but Alec Baldwin keeps beating him.  =/  He’s nominated again this year, though.  Good luck, Steve!

Extra Tidbit:  You might recognize the warehouse guy, Darryl,  in many comedic movies, like Zack and Miri Make a Porno and Pineapple Express.

*****************************

6.  DEXTER:  This is my new found favorite show because of its great cast and writing.  Dexter Morgan is a serial killer who kills serial killers, and happens to be a cop.  He’s as lovable as Hannibal Lecter but only kills people who he thinks deserves to die, and takes his victims to what he calls his “cutting courtroom.”  Flashbacks to his childhood and adolescence offer more insight into his character, which reminds me of Lost flashbacks.  Whenever I saw posters for this show, I always thought of American Psycho, a movie which I never liked, but Dexter is far from psychotic and don’t let the posters fool you.   He’s a killer that the audience will root for and the show is filled with lots of humor.

Set in Miami, the soundtrack is all Cuban, which gives a different flair to this show and I love it!  The characters are also awesome. There’s Debra Morgan, Dexter’s sister who is also a cop and has a tendency of falling into bad relationships; Angel Batista, the cool cat cop who is having problems with his wife; James Doakes, the intense cop who thinks Dexter is a freakazoid (he reminds me of Carl Weathers for some reason); Lieutenant Laguerta, the Latina spitfire who’s headstrong and loves brightly-colored blazers and layers of necklaces; Vince Masuka, the sexually-inappropriate joker cop; Rita, Dexter’s mousey but sweet girlfriend that keeps him grounded; and other characters that come along throughout the seasons.  (By the way, it took me forever to place Rita’s face.  She was the receptionist at Melvin Udall’s – Jack Nicholson – editor’s office in As Good as It Gets.  She asked Udall, “How do you write women so well?”  He replied, “I think of a man, and I take away all reason and accountability.”)

Instead of solving one case for each episode, it deals with one case for the whole season.  And since Dexter is aired on Showtime, there is a lot of cussing, but to me, whenever any foul language is used on Dexter, it doesn’t seem like it’s being put in just because foul language is allowed, like with some other shows.  I don’t notice them cussing and it just seems like natural conversation, given the circumstances of things.  So I don’t find it offensive but some people may.  The show also has sex and nudity so it is not appropriate for children.  But if you like CSI, chances are that you’ll love Dexter.

Extra Tidbit:  Michael C. Hall (Dexter) and Deb (Jennifer Carpenter) found love on the show and are married to each other.  It’s weird that they have to play brother/sister on the show, huh?

********************************

7.  LOST:  It’s way more than a survivor show but you must watch Lost from the very first episode in order to understand everything.  It’s not something you can just start watching at some random time, and that’s the only con about this fabulous show.  Again, great writing filled with suspense, mystery and surprises, not to mention interesting characters with layered backgrounds makes this another favorite show of mine.  Season Three was the worst but don’t let that discourage you into continuing on with the series.

Terry O’Quinn as John Locke is amazing with a capital A!  He’s my absolute favorite character in this mysterious saga.  Oh the questions you’ll have, and just when you think you’ve got them answered, there’s a slew of new questions.  The final season is airing early next year and I just can’t wait!  Read more about Lost, here.

****************************

8.  LIFE ON MARS:  The best cancelled show ever!  Maybe it was a victim of a bad time slot because I don’t know how ABC could cancel this very different and funny show.  It’s a cop show with no cell phones, Internet or DNA evidence – just old school grit and smarts, not to mention bell bottoms and Peter Pan collars.  Harvey Kietel is the LT and Jason Omara, whom I developed a crush for, plays Sam Tyler, a cop in the modern day who mysteriously wakes up in 1973.   Wanna know why and how it ended?  The complete series, only one season, is being released on September 29.  Everyone was robbed of another season of Life on Mars!

Extra Tidbit: How can you not laugh at Michael Imperioli’s costume?  I still remember him as Spider in Goodfellas.  LoL!

******************************

9.  THE BIG BANG THEORY:  This is one of the two sitcoms on my list and it’s just as hilarious as The Office.  A group of four geeky friends live in L.A. and their discussions will make you laugh and howl.  Sheldon, Jim Parson’s character, is the star of the show and Leonard (Johnny Galecki, Darlene’s boyfriend in Roseanne) is his roommate.  Two of their friends, Howard, who still lives with his mother, and Rajesh, the shy but sweet Indian guy, visit the roommates each episode to add to the laughs.  Penny is Leonard’s neighbor, who works at The Cheesecake Factory and Leonard wants to get with her.  (If you’ve seen the show, they do not wear uniforms like that at The Cheesecake Factory!)

The opening credits is the most interesting of any show and flashes images throughout history.  I recorded it once and hit pause over and over again just to see each image.

******************************

10.  KINGS: Another cancelled show that succumbed to bad ratings this summer.  Ian McShane, who plays King Silas, was made for this role.  Kings is set in a modern world but has a medieval feel with its language and architecture.  Strictly a drama with a bit of comedy from the two guards outside the gates, Kings has some tense moments and deals with relationships, especially familial.  The biblical references are very obvious with this show.  It’s too bad it was cancelled and I felt that the end was left somewhat open.  Maybe they’ll bring it back?

*******************************

Honorable Mentions

• Criminal Minds:  It was better with Lola Glaudini and Mandy Patinkin, though.  (“Hello, my name is Inigo Montoya.  You killed my father.  Prepare to die.”  You’ll know what movie that quote is from if you’re a fan of it.)
• Monk (Seasons 1-3):  A San Francisco detective with OCD and little quirks made this show fun to watch, but that was only when Sharona, played by Bitty Schram was still on the show and the writing was much better.  (You’ll most likely remember Bitty from A League of Their Own; she was Evelyn, the “no crying in baseball” girl.)  But since then, she’s been replaced by a mousey and uninteresting character called Natalie Teeger, and it’s gone all downhill from then.  Season 4 was still enjoyable but the cases have been dumb-down.  I watched Seas0n 7 on DVD and it was horrible except for one episode, “Mr. Monk’s 100th Case,” which is one of my favorite episodes of all seasons.  “Mr. Monk and the Three Pies” is my top fave.

Simply put, I like shows that are smart, well-written, exciting and thrilling with strong characters, comedic moments and meaningful drama.  If I watch a pilot and it doesn’t grasp me, chances are that I’ll never watch it again, like True Blood.  I don’t watch Gossip Girl, 90210, ER, Prison Break or Terminator.  I also gave up on Heroes , Numb3rs and Desperate Housewives.  But if you enjoy any show on my Top 10 list, you may want to check out the others.  Also, check the sidebar for links to all these shows and other shows that I watch.

COMING SOON:  ShowzNBookz Top 10 TV Shows of Yore (80s & 90s)

Favorite Commercial of the Moment: A Dog and his Bone 09/06/2009

A shaggy-haired dog worrying about his bone is my favorite commercial of the moment.  The fitting song in the background is “Trouble” by Ray Lamontagne.  I can’t help but smile and laugh every time I see this.   The dog is actually a better actor than most people in Hollywood.  I love his or her reaction when the cat passes by.   And to think, it’s just a commercial for an insurance company.  Way to go guys!

UPDATE:  The dog’s name is Chopper and he’s a rescue dog.  He’s got the most distinct and adorable ears.  How can you not love him?  But if you watch the video again at the part where the dog digs up his bone at night, it appears to be a different dog.  It doesn’t have the pointy ears and its coat looks darker.  What do you think?  I didn’t even notice that until someone made a comment on it.  But I don’t care; it’s still my favorite commercial right now.  Love that dog!

I Once Was LOST, But Now Am Found 08/31/2009

If you’ve ever tried to watch Lost without starting from the very first episode, you simply end up, lost.  What a fitting title, huh?

Last weekend, on a whim, I decided to watch the pilot of Lost, since it’s available as an “instant play” (no annoying commercials) for Netflix members.  For someone like me who was never into the whole Survivor thing, I was taking a giant leap.  Sure, I heard great things about the show but I just couldn’t get past the Survivor theme, but I am so glad I got past my prejudice.  I have watched four seasons of Lost in 8 days (yup, I currently have a lot of time on my hands, lol).   I have lost much sleep staying up until 3 in the morning trying to catch up on this show, which has become my personal brand of crack right now.

But it still isn’t a better show than my beloved 24 (don’t mess with Jack Bauer) or Battlestar Galactica (sniffle, why did it have to end?).  However, Lost will probably be put onto my top ten list of best TV shows.  Yup, it deserves a place there and I’m looking forward to the last episodes.

*FAVORITE CHARACTERS*

• John Locke: Oh my gosh.  Why haven’t I ever heard of Terry O’Quinn before?  This guy deserves Emmy’s and Oscar’s and every other acting award there is!  Whenever he speaks, he reminds me of a cross between Robert Duvall and Dennis Hopper.  I just want to hear him say once, “I love the smell of napalm in the morning…Smelled like…victory.”   After seeing the episode entitled “Walkabout”, I was amazed and shocked.  That was when I knew the writing for this show was superb.  John Locke is a tortured man who has always been treated wrongly, but on the island, you’ll notice he’s very spiritual, sagacious and Zen-like.  He’s probably one of the best characters there ever was.
• Mr. Eko: A gentle giant who can turn into Sayid-times-ten in a heartbeat.  Why, oh why, did he have to die in that lame way?  I really wished they kept Eko around longer.
• Hugo “Hurley” Reyes:  Everybody loves Hurley!  He offers comic relief for the show.
• Hugo’s Mother:  Ay, Mamacita.  She’s even funnier than Hurley.
• Desmond:   You’ll meet Desmond in the Hatch and think he’s crazy and very unstable.  In later seasons, he became one of my favorites.  I admire his relationship with Penny.

*THE MOST TOUCHING BACKGROUND STORIES*

• John Locke
• Mr. Eko
• Sun and Jin

Grab some tissue.

***WARNING!  SPOILERS AHEAD!***

*THE LEAST INTERESTING BACKSTORY*

Charlie.  Every episode that featured Charlie’s flashbacks were quite a snore for me.  It lacked substance because he and his brother were just rock star substance abusers.  That’s it.  Ho-hum.   (Sometimes, I still find myself calling him Merry, because of Lord of the Rings, instead of Charlie.)  What bothered me about Charlie was how he was acting like Claire’s boyfriend/husband or even Baby-Daddy, and I always thought Claire only saw him as a friend and nothing more, while Charlie had some fantasy in his head.

*LITERARY REFERENCES*

I appreciate all the literature that pops up in Lost, and it’s ironic that a conman and convict like Sawyer enjoys reading so much.  The first book I saw was Watership Down, one of my favorite novels written by Richard Adams.  The characters and theme of the book relate to Lost, so check that book out if you have a chance.  In fact, I need to read it again and it’s sitting on one of my shelves.

Another book I’ve seen in Lost are The Brothers Karamazov, which is about patricide and other philosophical things.  It was torture getting through that book!  And to think, I read it for pleasure.

I had a good laugh when Sawyer was reading Are You There God? It’s Me, Margaret by Judy Blume.

Then there was that Stephen King novel that was being discussed at the book club meeting at Juliet’s.  I never caught the title of that one though.

Desmond was saving Our Mutual Friend by Charles Dickens as his last read.

What other books have appeared in Lost?  The Fountainhead, Of Mice and Men and a bunch of others.

*RANDOM HIGHLIGHTS*

Season One

• When Michael was trying to communicate with Sun, who he thought only spoke Korean, he was trying to tell her he was going to go on a hunt and wanted her to watch his son, Walt.    The way he gestured “hunt” to Sun always makes me crack up – he makes a fist and pounds it down in the air.  I know, that doesn’t seem funny in text but you have to see it for yourself.
• Hurley listened to his portable CD player (what, no IPODs?) at the end of every day and his battery never gave out.   Late in the season, in the episode “…In Translation”, when your wondering why that battery has magically lasted so long, it finally gives out and we hear it die in the background.   I thought something went wrong with the audio on my computer.
• They saved Hurley’s flashbacks for last.  It took forever to get to his story but it was worth it and I think they wanted viewers to suffer until late in the season.
• I loved the episode “Walkabout.”
• Poor Boone, the cutest guy on the island.
• I noticed Locke’s clothes always looked clean and crisp.  This is the sweatiest, dirtiest, stinkiest-looking show on TV, but in Season One, John Locke always looked so fresh!

Season Two

• During the episode “The 23rd Psalm”, the smoke monster – which I dub as the “Godzilla Smoke” because of it’s cheesy sound effects – scared the crap out of me.  I was laying on my side enjoying the show when my whole body literally jump back half a foot.  I couldn’t help but laugh at myself for the next minute, at 2 in the morning.
• After watching the orientation film in the Hatch, or the Swan Station, Locke says “We’re gonna have to watch that again.”  Another lol moment.  You just have to see it, folks.
• Mr. Eko and Libby died – so sad.  But Anna Lucia got shot and killed!  Yay!  I personally can’t stand Michelle Rodriguez when she tries to be all tough and butch with her droopy puppy dog eyes and attitude.
• Poor Shannon and Sayid.
• Sawyer’s un-PC nicknames can get annoying but sometimes it’s just funny.  No hard feelings toward Hurley, but I busted out laughing when Sawyer called him Rerun and Snuffy.  Oh yeah, and he made a reference to a Wookie prisoner trick that one of the Others didn’t fall for, which was also funny.  Wait, I think that was in Season 3.   It gets confusing, you know.
• Man, do I miss the Hatch. =(

Season 3

• Episode “Enter 77″ was another notable episode
• I liked the story about Nadia the cat, and how the woman Sayid tortured could forgive him.
• Who the hell are Nikki and Paolo?  All the sudden they’re part of the crew and actually have dialogue.  I know, I know.  They were added in for comic relief, but who cares?!
• Oh snap, Jack and Claire are half-siblings!
• When Charlie died, I didn’t really get sad, but I appreciated his sacrifice.  Honestly, I started to get sick of him, plus he was the one who put a sack over Sun’s head and hit her with a rock or whatever.

Season 4

• Poor Jin.  But why did they have to spoil it for us?  I think it would have been more sad if we saw the boat explode without knowing that Jin would die.  Poor Michael?   Nah, it’s more like poor Walt.
• I’m liking Ben more.  He’s just so dang polite sometimes.  Poor Alex.
• I’m loving the addition of Frank, Miles and Daniel.  Miles is not a virtuous character but I love his sarcasm and dark side.  It took me forever to place his face – he was in Rush Hour.  Then there’s Jeremy Davies – I love his quirks.  If you need a kooky character, cast Jeremy Davies and he wont let you down.  (Check out Rescue Dawn, one of my all time favorite movies.  Davies plays a crazy POW.)
• Who the heck is Jeremy Bentham?  Oh no, it’s Locke!

*BEST OF THE SEASONS*

Seasons 1 and 2 were definitely the best, but Season 1 was still slightly better than the latter, maybe because I couldn’t stand Anna Lucia/Michelle Rodriguez.  But I have never cried as much as I have watching these first two seasons of Lost than with any other show.

Season 3 was when it started to go downhill.  In the first two seasons, I cared for many of the characters but then I “lost touch” with them and started hating them.  I got sick of Kate and wondered why she would sleep with Sawyer in the polar bear cage out in the open when anyone could walk up on them.  And why did she start falling for Sawyer in the first place?  Because they were both the same – cons and liars.  Maybe she thought she wasn’t good enough for Jack and gravitated more toward the sleazy conman.  Then, I hated the whole Jack and Juliet thing.  After one week, he’s all in love with her already, which is just as silly as being in love with Kate after a few weeks.  Now Kate is involved in two love triangles.  It makes me want to barf.   If you’re in love with two people at the same time, then you do not love any one of them.  True love cannot be shared!

Also, they got captured by the Others and not until three-quarters of the way through the season, does someone – I think it was Sayid – finally ask one of the Others what exactly is going on on the island: who are they and why are they kidnapping people?!

Season 4 returned and made a complete 180 from the previous season.  I started to care about the characters again and the magic from the first two seasons was brought back.  There were still flashbacks, but this time it was reversed from the original formula.  Instead of flashbacks from the island to a person’s backstory, we flashback from the present – after being rescued – to the island.  Some people call these flashforwards, but to me, they’re still flashbacks.  But thankfully, season 4 restored my faith in Lost, because I was about to give up on this show.

*THE QUESTIONS*

• Why does Richard wear guyliner and why doesn’t he age?
• What exactly is the Godzilla Smoke – the smoke monster – and can Ben summon it whenever he wants?  Did Ben kill Mr. Eko?
• Why does Locke see the Godzilla Smoke as a bright, white light and not a dark entity?  In season one, when he played backgammon with Walt, how did Locke know about the dark and light sides of the island?  Also, the smoke dragged Locke through the jungle then let him go.  Why?  Eko wasn’t that lucky the second time around.
• Why was Walt showing up on the island like a ghost?
• Why did Claire leave Aaron to join her “dead” father?
• What’s the significance of the numbers: 4 8 15 16 23 42.  I see Flight 815, then there’s the 2.342 frequency of Daniel’s device.  Six numbers and the Oceanic Six.  But there’s 10 digits.  What does it all mean?!
• Where’s Vincent been lately? Arf!  Will he ever have flashbacks to his past that will enrich the story?  Lol, that would be cool.
• Why were the Others capturing polar bears and doing experiments with them?  I thought it was Walt’s special abilities that made the polar bears appear on the island, but those cages look like they’ve been there for some time.
• Why don’t they ever close the eyes of dead people they don’t care about, i.e. Nikki and Paolo, and I’m sure there were others.  Have you noticed that all the people that died, who we cared about so much, died with their eyes open?   And there’s always a scene where their eyes have to be manually shut.
• Who’s Jacob and why was he invisible to Locke and not to Ben?  Ben went all Anthony Perkins on us in that cabin…scary.
• Isn’t it too coincidental that all the characters have crossed paths in the past and are connected with each other?  “Don’t mistake coincidence with fate” – John Locke.  Someone or something purposely brought them together.
• What were those hieroglyphics on the timer in the Hatch?  Which brings me to…

*THE HIEROGLYPHICS: A SHOWZNBOOKZ REVELATION*

I love Egyptology and all things Ancient Egypt, so when I saw those hieroglyphics pop up on the timer in the Hatch during Season 2, I had to bust out with a book in my room that has a chapter on hieroglyphics. Now, I can’t remember which exact episode and at what exact time I paused my video and wrote down the symbols, but the picture above are the same ones I wrote down, however, the second symbol in the picture is spinning.  What I saw was a symbol that looked like a counter-clockwise spiral.

The definite matches I found were for the 1st, 3rd, and 4th symbol, which represent a folded cloth (the letter “s”), a reed (letter “j”)  and a vulture ( letter “a”).  So far, the word is:  S _ J A _.   I was hoping that it would spell a word or something but it turned out to be garbage.  Then I went on to try to find the closest match for the other two symbols- the spiral and the diagonal line.

What matched the counter-clockwise spiral the best, was a hieroglyphic that looks like a squared-off clockwise spiral, kind of like a Greek key design.  That represents a courtyard and the letter is transcribed as an “h.”  Now the “word” is this: SHJA_.    Makes no sense, right?  Let’s get to the last symbol.

The only symbol that I could find that kind of matched the one on the timer was a diagonal line with a little handle on the top, denoting the letter “k.”  This symbol was in the hieratic form, which descended from the hieroglyphic form, and represented a basket.  Now the word is: SHJAK.  If we think of this as an acronym, it’s the initials of the Oceanic 6: Sun, Sayid, Hurley, Jack, Aaron and Kate – keep in mind that the “s” was used twice.  Is this a Scooby-Doo moment?  Or just some stupid coincidence that has no relevance at all?  LoL.  I have no idea but hey, it kind of worked out, didn’t it?  I’ll include a picture of the table from my book.  Why do you think?

Have you noticed that the hieroglyphics on the timer and on the book are backwards?  I heard about time travel in Season 5, so it makes sense, right?  It fits!  LoL.

Or it could mean something else.  I remember when Ben went into his secret room, there was another secret door, looking very ancient and cave-like, and I think I remember seeing symbols on the walls.  After that, the Godzilla Smoke killed most of the baddies outside.  Maybe it’s a code to summon the monster?  I still like the Oceanic 6 theory, though.

Taken from p. 484 from “The Encyclopedia of Ancient Egypt” , General Editor Helen Strudwick, Amber Books, 2006.

*I’M GOING TO SPOIL IT FOR MYSELF*

I’ve decided that I can’t wait three months until Season 5 of Lost comes out on DVD, so I’m going to read spoilers of the first few episodes online, and then I’m going to watch the last 6 episodes posted on ABC.  I’m fine with it because with a show like Lost, you’ll have to watch it more than once to absorb all the details and fully understand things.  I think when I see it on DVD, it’ll make even more sense.  Now, let me get back to the island…

*UPDATE*

Who is that unnamed man taking to Jacob at the beginning of the finale of Season 5?  I’ll call him Esau, since that’s Jacob’s brother in the bible.  If you read about their story, Jacob and Esau were rivals, even in the womb.  Jacob stole Esau’s birthright by tricking his father into it, like a wolf in sheep’s clothing.

I’m thinking the unnamed man, “Esau”, is what I call the Godzilla Smoke, or smoke monster. He’s been shape-shifting himself into Christian Shepard, Yemi (Eko’s brother), Locke’s father and Alex, in order to use their loved ones for his own agenda – to kill Jacob.   So maybe Jacob isn’t the good guy – “Esau” is.   But why did “Esau” need to find a loophole to kill Jacob?  Couldn’t he just kill Jacob himself?  What consequences would he suffer if he did it himself?  So the smoke monster changed himself into “Fake Locke” (oh no, he really is dead) and persuaded Ben to kill Jacob.    With Jacob dead, “Esau” becomes God of the island and he gets to decide who’s on the list.  I just want to know what all this means already!

Did “Esau” shapeshift into Walt, too?  Maybe that’s why Walt was showing up on the island after he left it, and his apparition lead to Shannon’s death.  And then in Season 3, we definitely knew that the smoke monster appeared as Yemi to Mr. Eko.  “You talk to me as if I were your brother”, said the fake Yemi, and Eko replied suspiciously, “Who are you?”  Then the smoke monster killed one of my favorite characters.  I always thought Eko was too much of a great and interesting character to have been killed off so early.  I hate the writers for doing that!  What happened to that unfinished church, anyway?

But let me get back to the island, which seems to be an ancient land since there was a huge statue of Sobek, the Egyptian god with a head of a crocodile.  He carries an ankh in his hand – a symbol of healing but translates as “eternal life” or “the key of life.”  Richard has eternal life because he never ages, and it seems like Jacob and “Esau” have been around for a very long time, also.  Remember when Ilana calls Richard Ricardos and the answer to her question, “What lies in the shadow of the statue” was in Latin?  It looks like “Esau” has been trying to kill Jacob since B.C. times, and boy did he have to go through a lot of trouble to kill his brother. But for what reason?!

Sobek is the god of fertility for crops and for people.  Aha!  But if he’s the God of fertility, then why can’t pregnant women live and give birth on the island?  There must be a reason why people can’t procreate on the island and maybe the death of Jacob will set this right, or then again, maybe it will be chaos.  I just want to know already!  I don’t know if I can wait until January because I’ve been feening for my crack: Lost.

What Not To Rent: List #1 08/30/2009

I’m going to start a post near the end of every month about what not to rent at the video store or what not to put in your Netflix queue.   The following list will include some movies from June of this year but upcoming WNTR lists will be for that particular month only.  Okay, so let’s get to it.

1. Duplicity: Starring Julia Roberts, Clive Owen, Paul Giamatti and Tom Wilkinson.  They tried to market this movie as a thriller involving espionage.  Whatever!  It was a lukewarm romance.

2.  Streets of Blood:  Starring Val Kilmer, 50 Cent and Sharon Stone.  Actually, 50 Cent didn’t act as badly as he did in Home of the Brave, but it was definitely not a notable performance.  If you’re going to pick rappers to act in movies, stick with Ice Cube or Ice-T.   This is just one of those really bad, really gritty, gangster-cop movies.

3.  Fragments:  Starring Kate Beckinsale, Forest Whittaker, Dakota Fanning, Jennifer Hudson and Guy Pearce.  The cast makes it seem like it’ll be worth watching, huh?  Wrong.  Maybe that’s why I’ve never heard of this movie until I was scrolling through new releases.  Dakota Fanning does a good job at being a crazy, religious fanatic, though.

4.  Passengers:  Starring Anne Hathaway and Patrick Wilson.  At some point, it was really predictable.  It was a rip-off of a Bruce Willis movie.  Hope that didn’t spoil it for you.

5.  The Women:  Starring Meg Ryan, Annette Benning, Jada Pinkett Smith, Eva Mendes, Debra Messing and Bette Midler.  This remake of a 1939 movie stars absolutely no men, and I mean NO men, not even in the background.   And that’s not even the reason why I didn’t like it.

6.  Harold & Kumar Escape from Guantanamo Bay:  Starring Kal Penn and John Cho.  Your basic frat boy type of movie, but on the lowest end.

7.  Push: Starring Djimon Hounsou, Dakota Fanning and Chris Evans. A weak superhero movie with weak super powers.  I always wonder why talented actors pick really bad roles.  Maybe Djimon and Dakota just wanted to do an action/superhero flick?

8.  Knowing:  Starring Nicholas Cage and Rose Byrne.  When is Nick Cage going to be in an awesome movie again?  Adaptation was his last great role but I think Matchstick Men, Lord of War and World Trade Center were somewhat notable roles.  I haven’t seen Bangkok Dangerous yet becasue I heard it was bad.  Should that be on the list, too?

9.  Venus: Starring Peter O’Toole.  I know it was supposed to be something more beautiful than a dirty old man chasing around a young girl, but I just couldn’t see past that.

10.  Premonition:  Starring Sandra Bullock.  I tried to like it but in the end, I couldn’t.

The Ho-Hum of the Month

• Adventureland:  Starring Kristen Stewart, Ryan Reynolds and Jesse Eisenberg.  For me, it didn’t live up to all the hype.  Lisa P. dancing to Expose’s Point of No Return makes me laugh, though.   Oh, and the played out Rock Me Amadeus was funny, too. “Bella” was a little better in this movie than in Twilight but the role was still a little tomboyish.  (Do you remember Kristen Stewart as Jodie Foster’s daughter in Panic Room?  I seriously thought she was a boy and always wondered why they dressed her up like that and why her hair was so boyish.   Being a tomboy is fine – I was one when I was a kid – but they made her look like a straight up boy.  I never got why they did that.)

Reco of the Month

• I Love You, Man:  Starring Paul Rudd, Rashida Jones, Jason Segal, Jaime Pressly and Jon Favreau.  A hilarious bromance with funny references to movies like The Princess Bride and shows like Lost.  Definitely not an offensive and raunchy frat boy type of movie, which is what I thought it would be.  Pressly and Favreau, the couple that hate but still love each other, are so freaking funny!

Happy Birthday Michael Jackson 08/29/2009

He came, he awed, he inspired.

If he was still with us, the one and only Michael Jackson would have turned 51 today.  He would have been in London performing his amazing concerts, awing and inspiring the world again.  Though he is no longer here physically, MJ will always be here through his music, his dancing, his performances, his videos – his legacy.

Today, his true fans are celebrating his life and I wish his family the best.

It’s been two months Michael, and I still miss you – always will.

Do you remember the episode on The Simpsons where Homer is locked up in a mental institution and he meets a very large guy who thinks he’s Michael Jackson?  It was the opening episode of season 3 and it was titled “Stark Raving Dad.”  MJ was a big fan of the show and he got to voice this part.  The singing in the episode, however, was not by him, but in the video above, it is Michael singing “Lisa, It’s Your Birthday.”  Go rent this disc because it’s a very good episode and make sure to listen to the DVD commentary.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY MICHAEL JACKSON!  =)

(August 29, 1958 – June 25, 2009)

Here’s something that will make you smile.  At around 1:10, Michael realized that his zipper was down and was so embarrased by it.  How cute!

And since we never see enough of the real Michael Jackson, the person aside from his performances, here’s some funny home vids.